But! But! But! You might be thinking of an appropriate excuse why this doesn’t apply to you. Why you can’t talk to people, stand out, sign them up and get clients. It comes down to what you REALLY WANT… Reasons or Results? That’s it. You either have Reasons or Results in life. You want something. Chances are you want many things. It may be a new hairstyle, more money, new clothes, more clients, win the lottery or just not have to commute to an office anymore. Whatever it is you want, you’re either actively working to get it, or you have reasons why you can’t, don’t, won’t, or shouldn’t have it. Are there things from your past that you wanted? Still do? You either got them or have reasons why you don’t, can’t, won’t or shouldn’t. That’s Yoda-type logic. You either have it, or you have reasons why you don’t. It’s not a difficult concept. Either you’re actively going after something with a ‘whatever-it-takes’ attitude until you get it (result). Or, your energy is focused on creating a myriad of reasons why you don’t. If you find yourself explaining the reasons you didn’t/couldn’t, chances are you’re in your “story.” The ‘Story’ I refer to are the beliefs you have about what happened to you in the past, and why you can’t do, be or have something. For the longest time, my story was; “I got beat up and ridiculed by my brothers for years. The constant losing caused me to think of myself as weak and stupid…because one brother beat me up a lot (so I was weak), and the other ridiculed me a lot (so I was stupid).” That “story” caused me to do some negative things like flounder in school since I “knew” I was stupid, and be okay with 2nd place in sports because I “knew” I was weak. Don’t get me wrong, that “story” had positive aspects as well. Feeling weak and stupid gave me a fire in the belly to “show them.” I have found that my “I’ll show you” motivation is pretty powerful and served me for a long time. You know what I’m talking about. When someone puts you down, or says “you can’t do…” whatever it is you can’t do. Perhaps it’s; learn a language, build a business, learn how to cook, dance, sing, write, ‘fill-in-the-blank.’ You seem to find the motivation to get it done. But, honestly, it became a game when someone said “David, you can’t do…” Wow, thank you for that motivation, as I went and kicked serious butt at whatever I was told I couldn’t do. But, I’ve found, that beyond “Story” and beyond “I’ll show you…” lies a stronger motivation for me. Because, at the end of the day, I realize those motivations are about others and not about me, and ultimately, I found they have their limitations.
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